Friendship with the Ex, Part 2: How To Do It

  Recently I talked about whether or not friendship with an ex is a good idea. It’s clear from the comments, and comments I get on Twitter, Facebook, and on other articles, that people have greatly differing opinions on this. Whether or not you can — or want to — be friends with your ex is up to you. It depends on your unique situation. If you do want to, however, simply saying, “Hey, let’s be friends” isn’t often enough. You […]

Christie Hartman’s Dating Advice: Most Popular Blog Articles

I’ve been running this blog for some years now. Some of you have been around as long as this blog has, whereas many of you are newer. It’s been fun to watch the blog following grow, to see which articles rank highly in Google (not always the ones you’d expect!), and, of course, to see which articles will strike a chord with readers. Even a psychologist like myself can’t often predict how people will react to a particular article, and […]

“Back In The Game: Succeeding With Women After a Divorce” now available!

Greetings all! A couple of brief announcements: 1) I just released a new book for men: Back In The Game: Succeeding With Women After a Divorce. Right now it’s in ebook format (available only on the Kindle reader). If you don’t have a Kindle, you can download free software from Amazon that will let you read it (or any other Kindle book) from your computer or device. Or, if you prefer some other format, contact me and we’ll talk. It […]

Dating after Divorce: Know Why You’re Dating

If you’ve read Changing Your Game, or read any of my recent stuff, you know that I’m all about knowing what you want out of dating. It’s not enough to want to “meet people,” or “get back in the game,” or “find someone.” That’s too fuzzy. And fuzzy thinking leads to fuzzy results, or worse. When we’re single, we want one of 4 things: casual sex, casual dating, a relationship, or marriage. The clearer you are about what you want, […]

Dating after Divorce: Getting Back in the Game, or Learning the Game from Scratch?

I met a very cool woman last week. She’s (roughly) 40, 2 kids, divorced a couple of years ago. She’s JUST getting back into dating and has had NO luck at all so far. She isn’t sure how to meet men, and the brief time she spent online resulted in no dates. I asked how long was married. 20 years, she said. She married her high school sweetheart! So, basically, my new friend is not getting back into the dating […]

Dating a Separated Man whose Ex-Wife Won’t Let Go

Hi Christie I’m 44, never been married and have never had children. I’m involved with a man that has filed for divorce but has yet to finalize it. I would have to describe our falling in Love similar to what it must have been like back when you didn’t have a physical relationship with someone until after you were married. I fell in Love after long discussions about Life. Talking about what mistakes we’ve made in relationships, what we would […]

Dating the Divorced Man #2

After Dating the Divorced Man hit the shelves in 2007, it became a remarkable success. Between the challenges of children, difficult ex-wives, and the emotional baggage divorced men can carry with them, Dating the Divorced Man became an invaluable guide for thousands of women. Now, Christie has finally released the book’s 2nd edition. After seven years of coaching the women who date these men, answering their emails, and fielding thousands of blog comments, the new edition includes even more wisdom and case examples in addition […]

Help: My Boyfriend’s Ex-Wife Won’t Leave!

  Hello Dr. Hartman, I have been dating a guy for 6 years. We’re in our 50s. We both have children: his are grown, mine are teenagers. He has been divorced for over ten years. My dilemma: after the first couple of years, things were fine. His ex, that has also still loved him and never got over the divorce, was diagnosed with breast cancer and he allowed her to move in while she recovered, which I understood the compassion. […]

Badmouthing the Ex: A Bad Idea

Hi all! Unless you’re 18 or haven’t been getting out much, you have an ex. If you’re like many of my clients, you have an ex-spouse, which, let’s face it, is like an ex to the third power. And chances are, you have at least one ex you don’t like or who did things he or she shouldn’t have. Maybe you’ve been lied to, cheated on, talked down to, criticized, dumped, or just misunderstood.  And that sucks. But no matter […]

He Finally Signed His Divorce Papers: So Why is He in a Funk?

Dear Christie: I bought your book Dating the Divorced Man, and thought it was a great book.  Of course, every situation can’t be discussed within the constraints of a book, and I have one of those “situations”. I met a guy over 4 years ago and we became friends. He was married with 2 children and had been having many problems with his wife for many years. During our friendship, he became interested in me, but I was never attracted to him; […]